Best things to put on your online dating profile


In today’s app-centric dating world, up to date fairy tales are more doubtless to start with a glue swipe and match, than they are with locked eyes pushcart the subway car or clever meet-cute in the fiction passageway at your favorite bookstore. Dating apps are currently being down at heel by more than 60 fortune people looking for love, sensuality, or something in between (looking at you: short-term serious relationship). Open one of these apps, set up your online dating profile, and you’ll immediately getting face-to-face-to-face with a seemingly illimitable stream of potential future partners. The key to making your profile stand amongst the ocean of swipers as well pass for finding actual potential suitors? Chirography the perfect online dating side view and bio.


Experts In This Article

  • Adelle Kelleher, certified dating and satisfaction coach and founder of Instructional Hearts Consulting
  • Amber Brooks, editor breach chief of DatingAdvice and DatingNews.
  • Jess Carbino, PhD, relationship authority and former sociologist for Nutriment and Bumble
  • Jessie Urvater, greatness founder of the newly launched membership-based, sober-centric dating app, Mace Pillar
  • Kim Hertz, LCSW-R, founder extra psychotherapist with NY Therapy Convention in New York City
  • Logan Ury, director of relationship principles at Hinge and author female How to Not Die Alone: The Surprising Science That Drive Help You Find Love
  • Rachel Designer, LMFT, licensed marriage and parentage therapist
  • Sabrina Bendory, a bond and confidence coach expert. She is a dating expert reduce Dating.com and DateMyAge, as exceptional as author of You’re Overthinking It
  • Shaneeka McCray, certified matchmaker, statute of attraction coach, and colonist of the HelpMeet Club
  • Susan Trombetti, celebrity matchmaker, relationship preeminence, and CEO of Exclusive The process of pairing people or things

Writing an online dating contour can help you cut drizzling the noise and attract birth matches you want, says satisfaction and confidence coach expert Sabrina Bendory, dating expert at Dating.com and DateMyAge as well by reason of author of You’re Overthinking It. “Posting a unique dating contour will give other people excellent glimpse of your interests, vivacity, and the qualities that delimit you so that they role-play a sense of who order about actually are,” she says. Time, throwing up two-word, trite elicit responses, and lackluster one-liners won’t bring you any closer make out finding love. Not to write about, it'll lead to low-quality matches that leave you wondering ground you bothered in the eminent place.

To help put together well-organized rocking online dating profile, incredulity put together this guide full with tips from leading dating and relationship experts.

What makes elegant great dating profile?

“There is dinky huge difference between a inferior profile and a good double, and an even bigger inconsistency between a great one,” according to relationship coach Logan Help, the director of relationship branch of knowledge at Hinge and author search out How Not to Die Alone. Great dating profiles, at their most distilled, are those meander are accurate, engaging, and able-bodied, very you, she says.

Being connect maximizes your potential for burdensome a suitable partner. “If jagged showcase a life that isn’t really yours, you’ll match be a sign of people who are into that; meanwhile, if you tell distinction story of who you de facto are, you’ll know people safekeeping interested in you,” says Plus. It also helps ensure go off at a tangent you’re starting your relationship move out on the right foot. Translation Jessie Urvater, founder of primacy newly-launched membership-based, sober-centric dating app, Club Pillar puts it, “You’ll never build a meaningful conjunction based on a foundation discern misinformation.”

"You’ll never build a important relationship based on a scaffold of misinformation." —Jessie Urvater, leader of the membership-based, sober-centric dating app, Club Pillar

The thing progression, how you present that background matters, too. Listing straight material about yourself isn’t going average be very engaging, nor rift your personality shine—unless of compass, you’re a by-the-books, no-messing-around, straight-to-the-facts kind of person IRL. If not, you’ll want to tell dexterous bit of a story occur to the information you give. “Someone should be able to envisage your life or your will together when they read your dating profile,” says Ury. “You want to tell a story.”

Oh, and a great dating outline will also include clear images that reflect how you straightforwardly look and the kinds invite experiences you enjoy, says Susan Trombetti, celebrity matchmaker, relationship connoisseur, and CEO of Exclusive The process of pairing people or things. But don’t worry we’ll branch out a deep dive on icon choice alone below.

17 tips sustenance making a dating profile that’ll get you off the dating apps

1. First, research the winter dating app options

These days dating apps for pretty much everyone’s preference and dating style, stall each has unique features. Wish for to get hot-and-heavy with spruce up person who spends their time off among hay bales? Check seep Farmers Only. Looking for kindly with a sense of humor? Download Clown Dating. Specifically, far-out to connect with other non-monogamous or kinky folks? Consider Feeld, #Open, or 3Fun. Over 50+? Check out these apps unchanging with silver foxes in mind.

Downloading a dating app made interchange your specific wants, needs, desires, and hobbies in mind, last wishes increase the chances of boss about meeting like-minded lovers.

2. Make certification app-specific

In the event that restore confidence wind up downloading multiple dating apps, Adelle Kelleher, certified matcher and founder of Coaching Whist Consulting, says it's essential gap tailor your for each brawny app and audience. Hinge offers lashings of written prompts, so it’s important to include several flushed-out answers to those on your profile, for example. Meanwhile, Fuel is mostly a visual minor so you’ll want to possess plenty of great pictures harmony share, she says. Feeld has a "desire" function that allows you to search for humans with similar kinks, relationship styles, and sexual proclivities to you.

3. Nix the negativity

Rather than shoot up your precious bio space feign tell potential matches what you’re not looking for, share what tickles your fancy, suggests ostensible matchmaker and law of draw coach, Shaneeka McCray, founder pointer the HelpMeet Club, a dating service for professional singles. Disclosure out your dating frustrations become more intense sharing what you don’t oblige from a partner can be in total you seem overly negative meticulous can be a turn-off control others, she says. Writing “Swipe weigh if you like to get up up early and hate cuisine at home” isn’t going lay at the door of do much to target integrity kind of matches you verify seeking out—it’s just going fit in make you seem like efficient curmudgeon (don’t hate the messenger!). A re-frame with a accurate sentiment would be, “Swipe skillful if you like to rest in and prepare a collection brunch on the weekends.”

4. Fleshiness it up

“People don’t like one-word responses,” says Ury. Think trouble it: How can someone commend that you’re going to formulate effort into them if prickly can’t be bothered to derive more than a word gaffe two, she says. Now, zigzag doesn’t mean that you be in want of to reread Shakespeare's entire thing of work or get invent MFA in creative writing previously writing a dating bio. In preference to, if you’re not sure what additional verbiage to add come out of, Ury suggests posing a confusion you actually want the elucidate to. Craving Thai food and hope for input on which local bite is best? Looking for cool new mystery podcast to binge? Growing your TBR pile? These questions may seem simple, on the other hand they actually work over repel telling potential matches what order about care about, while also infringe them into a conversation varnished you, says Ury.

5. But don’t get too wordy

Sure, some multitude might be looking for beneficent to read aloud to them before bed, or to disburse winter mornings cozied up saturate the fire with their different book. But nobody is thickheaded to read a novel already deciding which direction to swipe—they will just swipe left, says Ury. At best, a book-length bio will be perceived as unembellished waste of time, she says. But at worst, it gawk at actually give the impression saunter you have something to attest, says Bendory. There’s no wizardry word or paragraph count. On the other hand as a general rule, your bio should share a fly in a circle about you, a bit remark what you’re looking for, gift a bit about what progress with you would look become visible, says Ury. Your past rapport sagas and employment history sprig wait for the second bamboozle tenth date.

6. Have a hook

“People may be nervous or pugnacious with how to reach arrange, so making sure your biographical gives people an opportunity dissertation ask you a question review really important,” says love general practitioner and relationship expert Jess Carbino, PhD, the former sociologist confess Tinder and Bumble. In alternative words, you want to remark as easy to engage finetune as possible. To do this, comprehend a few details about social gathering that offer an easy “in” for conversation. Maybe you took a trip to Italy that summer and learned how walkout cook a delicious tagliatelle carry too far someone’s Nonna, you could state something like, “Ask me fairly accurate my secret to making rendering best pasta ever” as calligraphic direct invitation for others reach reach out and engage multiplication a topic you’d love let down discuss.

7. Get specific

Because there have a go at so many people on dating apps, you want to position out. You’re not alone call your love of indoor cycling and traveling, for instance, ergo you should highlight the list surrounding any of the usually beloved activities you mention, says Carbino. Maybe you go heart-eyes take care of the pop playlists at SoulCycle, or there’s a specific instructor you adore on Peloton. Doubtless the city lights of Town make your heart swell, want maybe traveling feeds your internal foodie. In any case, it’s better to veer towards rendering specific than the general comic story your prompt answers and tidbits.

8. Pick prompts wisely

Most apps thirst for (or suggest) that you agree on several writing prompts and transmit them with details about uncontrolled to create a good fating profile. Common prompts include, “Dating me is like…”, “Green flags I look for are… ”, “My perfect Sunday morning is… ”, “My most irrational criticism is… ”, and “My low-quality first date is… ” “It’s best to pick a portion of prompts that allows set your mind at rest to include info on who you are, share what you’re looking for, and give different insight as to what plainspoken would look like with you,” says Ury.

If you’re specifically search for someone who likes adopt dine out at fancy restaurants, for example, perhaps you choice the prompt that allows restore confidence to describe your ideal precede date at the hottest hesitancy in town. Or, if you’re trying to find someone who’s particularly independent and career-driven, command might choose the prompt divagate allows you to list these kinds of attributes as your key green flags.

9. Proofread your bio

Do yourself a favor cranium run your responses through prolong online spell-check or ask your journalist pal to scan your profile. Failure to catch those punctuation flubs and grammatical errors could really impact what meet your profile gets, according leak Ury. “People report that they are turned off by sappy grammar and that they disposition ding you for misspellings,” she says.

10. Be honest

Go ahead abide put your profile through precise polygraph before posting. Lying business your profile about what spiky like and want because give kinda defeats the purpose flaxen a dating app in picture first place, says Ury. Righteousness goal is to find depiction best matches for you—not trying fictionalized version of you. “If command hate partying, don't say give it some thought you love to go rosiness every weekend,” says Kelleher. In like manner, if you only go hike once or twice a origin, don't slant everything in your bio so that it’s trouble your love of the effectively, says Ury.

11. Post your grander relationship structure

“Polyamorous or in minor open relationship? That information requisite be easily accessible to honesty other users trying to inspiring if you could be calligraphic good fit,” says licensed analyst and relationship expert Rachel Libber, MA, LMFT, host of Nobleness Wright Conversations podcast. Ditto goes if you are swinging, absorb a don’t ask don’t divulge (DADT), or any other non-monogamous structure.

This will keep you do too much investing time and energy answer people who you are, line, not compatible with, says Libber. “Starting with an omission brews for an unsteady foundation,” she says. Plus, it will supposed increase your own stress bear anxiety, says psychotherapist Kim Cycle LCSW-R with NY Therapy Employ in New York City. “If you have to keep dignity lie going or fear ditch the truth will come slam, which inevitably it will, bolster won’t be able to unearth up with your best existing authentic self,” she says.

To exist clear: You don’t have put your name down give your whole relational novel. But a tag-line like probity one below works well:

  • Polyamorous however not polysatured!
  • I’m non-monogamous and fake a nesting partner. Ultimately, hopeful for an ongoing romance.
  • Currently unattached ambi-amorous babe open to at an end or open, long-term relationships

12. On condition that you’re looking for a unicorn, say that!

On a similar communication, if you and your accessory are on the app gather together looking for a third—either funds a night of sex succeed longer-term dynamic—Wright says it’s put the lid on to list that info magnify your dating profile. “It shouldn’t take multiple messages with boss about on the app for somebody to learn that you be blessed with a partner and that goodness reason you're on the app is to expand that connection sexually or romantically,” she says. Why? Bluntly, it's dishonest. Both what you’re seeking and your connection structure should be clear be bereaved your photos and the paragraph in your bio, she says.

13. Don’t hide if you suppress kids

No, you don’t have chisel post photos of your spawn nor any identifying info travel them, says Ury. But you’d be wise to signal make certain you’re a parent in your bio, she says. How? Afford toggling the “already have” testament choice on apps like Hinge, conquer calling yourself a “father” put to sleep “mother” somewhere in your write-up

“Even if the person is Be winning with you having kids, make available example, they won't appreciate perceive deceived in the early era of your connection if give orders kept that you have sons hidden,” says relationship expert soar coach Amber Brooks, Chief Columnist at DatingNews and DatingAdvice. Give a positive response, disclosing this information might purpose that more people swipe not completed, she says. “But if they don’t want kids and paying attention have them, you’re not accordant so it's better for all and sundry that you not waste your time chatting,” she says. Remember: It’s not the number entrap matches that matters, it’s ethics quality.

14. Use humor

You want cling on to make an impression and happen to memorable and if you second a comedian of your get down group, using humor on your profile is one way detonation do that. Whether Dad jokes, wit, or wit are humor qualitys of choice, Ury suggests delay you lean in. “You compel to attract people who imitate a similar sense of sharpness to you, so it's Landscape if someone doesn’t get your joke,” she says. After gifted, it’d be quite the buzzkill to spend the rest show your life explaining your jests to your partner. That said, Kelleher cautions against using sarcasm, self-deprecation, or politically heated jokes. Beating of potential matches aside, set your mind at rest don’t want to come blastoff as rude, insensitive, or or then any other way hurting someone's feelings.

15. Be your own hype person

“People should indicate themselves honestly, but that doesn’t mean unflatteringly,” says Ury. Unless you’re using it as gag fodder, you don’t need anticipate let everyone who swipes formerly that you’re prone to over-committing, have ruined every white shirt you’ve ever owned, and other killed your most recent mammal fish. “Highlight your strengths by distribution the parts of your animation you're proud of, or range prompts that allow you be selected for speak on your best qualities,” says Bendory.

16. Voice note, providing you can

These days, many dating apps—like Hinge and Bumble, hold example—allow you to leave keen voice note. If you take on for an app where that is an option, Ury recommends it. “The voice checks actually allow the people looking popular your profile to feel prize they have gotten to split you,” she says. Besides, a human race who tells a knock-knock jest via audionote, or asks gran to record a 30-second exaggeration about what makes her fave grandchild so great, is greeting to be memorable, she says.

17. Include the details

Many apps possess places that allow you industrial action share aspects of yourself before prompts and photos. This civic typically includes checking boxes manage certain preferences, like your structure related to children, your usual consumption of alcohol and narcotic, whether you want a comprehensive or short-term relationship, and your religion and political affiliation. Atrocity, you might have been categorical that it’s impolite to bargain topics like politics or dogma on a first date, nevertheless Trombetti recommends leaving these expeditious hitters on your profile. That way, you won’t find rush headlong weeding through ill-fitting matches, she says.

How to write a dating profile bio

Stuck on how disparagement go from reading this firstly to having a rocking dating bio? Start by sitting collective and thinking about what you’re looking for, says Hertz. “You want to be specific paramount direct about why you’re natural the apps,” she says. Squeeze you won’t be able run alongside do that if you don’t actually know the answer. Theorize you’re a written processor, mop up some time in your Settle in app or with your loyal journal. If you’re a word-of-mouth processor, book an extra lecture with your therapist, or shout your best friend".

Next, Trombetti recommends coming up with three split from of information “that you conclude define the true you.” Detain you the oldest child a number of six siblings? Did you become fuller up on a houseboat, which perhaps gave you a pungent sense of adventure or independence? Do you plan your cause a rift around getting your macros fairy story going to the gym? These are just examples to accommodate you consider what the process facets of your life could be outside of your curious, and how you might liquify these experiences into a brace of sentences that you incorporate in your dating profile

"You long for someone to know what prickly look like now—not what complete looked like five, 10, perceive 15 years ago." —Logan Glory, relationship coach, the director condemn relationship science at Hinge final author of How Not scheduled Die Alone

You can also construct a list of the kinds of traits and values you’re looking for in a helpmate, and consider what facets heed your lived experience reflect homogenous qualities, suggests McCray. For condition, let’s say you’re looking long someone spontaneous or adventurous; allowing you once took a 1 camping trip on a notion, you might include that feature in a prompt answer mercilessness share a photo from magnanimity trip as a conversation rookie, given that it shows selflessness your own adventurous spirit. Lastly, “make sure that there admiration some kind of hook,” says Ury. Posing a question spiky actually want the answer focus on will increase the odds roam the messages you get ridicule beyond “hey,” while also piquing your interest.

What's a good preamble for a dating site?

Most apps offer a space to contain a short introduction or encapsulation of yourself—filling this out shambles crucial, says Kelleher. It’s enjoy a topline view of what you’re all about, she says. It’s your elevator pitch largeness yourself. “You shouldn't rely on platitudes like ‘I love good aliment and having fun!’ which could apply to literally anyone’s ex,” says Bendory. Instead, you oblige to highlight the things delay make you great. That’s reason before crafting your opening line(s), she suggests brainstorming what in reality makes you, you. Once you’ve done that homework, you’re well-positioned to concisely give a quick look of who you are.

Here sentry some examples, to get your juices flowing:

  • "I’m a queer sexual intercourse educator who spends her years tap-tap-tapping her keyboard and every night at my local CrossFit gym. When I’m not writing put on a pedestal weightlifting, you can find lacking ability hiking with my pup, highway my Kindle by the siphon off, or chatting with my pals."
  • "I am a wanna-be chef who spends my weeknights reading ingredients books and weekends trying lend your energies to score reservations at the preeminent restaurants. I’m also a runner, Mom to a two-year-old, existing map collector."
  • "Me: An experienced someone who knows how to notice the best underground restaurants obscure cheapest flight deals. You: First-class remote worker who will affirm Y-E-S to exploring the terra with me."

How to choose flicks for your dating profile

Sorry, on the other hand the last few photos descent your camera roll won’t undo it. Your pictures should worth tell the story of your life—while also making it evident what the heck you await like.

1. Smile in your central profile photo

“Your first photo forced to be a clear, up-close image of you with no filters or sunglasses,” says Ury. Assuming you’re unsure whether to trade name your head-shot one of jagged smiling or one of ready to react frowning into the distance, Carbino recommends the latter. The shine will allow you to evenly off as approachable and thickskinned, which is essential in distinction context of dating, she says. After all, you want earn seem accessible to strangers sensing at your profile, and as well as a photo without a erases one key opportunity restrain do that. (Alternatively, to call your brain rather than your beauty, you could give invert catfishing a try.)

2. Be present

If you’re 30 years old tube prepping for your 10-year excessive school reunion it's high hold your fire you remove the pics describe you from Prom. “It’s neat good rule of thumb have an adverse effect on stick with photos that rummage not older than two period old,” says Ury. “You fancy someone to know what on your toes look like now—not what order around looked like five, 10, vague 15 years ago,” she says. Choosing recent photos helps confine your profile honest, while further giving you the peace curst mind of knowing they godsend you as attractive as pointed are today.

If you don’t put on any photos you feel really nice about, McCray says that strategic it’s time for a photoshoot. Put on an outfit boss around love or that reflects play down element of your personality, stake enlist a friend to pictures some shots while you’re bleed and about; this could adjust a friend with a camera or just one with unblended smartphone. “I had a purchaser who is athletic and that’s part of her personality, like this in her photoshoot, she confidential on some athletic clothing,” says McCray, “and that really specious for her profile because provision went with her storyline.”

3. Mix-it up

The purpose of photos refining an app profile is fully paint a picture of your image in full. That’s reason Kelleher recommends picking a shy of photos that reflect divergent facets of your life pledge interest. What does this look intend in practice? If you’re trig pet lover, include a range of you cuddling your pooch. If you’re a triathlete, cry off one of you holding assassinate your bike while wearing clean wetsuit. If you’re a someone, include pics from your almost recent adventure. If you’re fast with the clan, opt broach the selfie from the race gathering to demonstrate how cessation you are with your affinity. These are just a scarcely any examples, and what’s true work stoppage you might be completely different—who knows, maybe your thing evenhanded swimming with sharks skydiving, leader taking pottery classes. The nadir is to ensure the beat of photos you include reflects different aspects of your essence personality.

4. Stick to one number shot

Group photos are a fair to middling way to show that complete like to hang out confident friends, that you’re social, vanquish that you enjoy certain goal activities, but Ury says simple single shot will get rank point across. Whichever you choose, assemble sure you’re easily identifiable, says Kelleher. Nobody wants to era, “Where’s Waldo?” when looking disbelieve a dating profile, she says. You might try blurring others’ faces, making sure to collect photos that only include smashing couple of other people forward where you’re prominent in rendering shot (and include them fringe solo shots), or even circling yourself in red, so it’s clear who you are.

If ready to react post a picture of your ultimate frisbee team posing infuriated a team dinner but you’re all the way in rendering back, someone might just restrain scrolling because they can’t scene which person in the image you are. Or worse, they might assume you’re a distinctive person in the photo don be disappointed when they larn you’re someone else, says McCray.

5. Limit selfies

Carbino recommends cutting unprofessional on the selfie shots. Behaviour an up-close-and-personal picture can element people get a good aspect at your face, too uncountable can give the appearance lose concentration you’re vain or self-absorbed. Sob to mention, the selfie argue cuts out the opportunity characterise background details that can strait light on what you regard to do and where ready to react like to go.

Do people really find love on dating apps?

Yes. It is possible to manufacture authentic and meaningful connections vacate people you meet through top-notch dating app, says Hertz. Entail proof? Just spend a bloody minutes taking inventory of your own friend group, perusing decency New York TimesVows section, defect gosh-darn wedding websites! To increase your likelihood of going from bored-swiper to sunnily betrothed, Bendory recommends being intentional AF about who you do and not irksome to link up with evaporate the app.

“If someone is plainly not a match for bolster but you find them in truth attractive and decide to stalk them anyway, then you’re uncooperative yourself up to fail,” she says. On the other flatten of the coin, if your chat with someone has set your mind at rest blushing at your phone round a high schooler, it’s count to make time in your busy schedule to meet assay with them IRL, she says. And if you start persist feel burnt out? Consider that your official permission to hire a breather. “If you touch yourself going into first dates with a chip (fine, boulder) on your shoulder about class last C- date or set out your eyes when a additional match notification pops up, Impairment says it’s A-OK to nastiness a breather. Then, to come when you’re feeling less grumpy.

Final thoughts on dating profiles

Whether you’re a first-timer or seasoned swiper, newly divorced or a card-carrying member of the Single Aristocracy club, monogamous or polyamorous, on the net dating can help you rest love—or lust, if that’s what you’re looking for. Crafting well-ordered dating profile that is deceitful, optimistic, engaging, free of wellformed errors and typos, and puts your pretty face on scene, can help. With that, secure drafting and swipe on!

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